Friday, December 09, 2005
This will send ya to the looney bin!
HOW TO WRAP PRESENTS WITH DOGS IN THE HOUSE1. Gather presents, boxes, paper, etc. in middle of living room floor.2. Get tape back from puppy.3. Remove scissors from older dog's mouth.4. Open box.5. Take puppy out of box.6. Remove tape from older dog's mouth.7. Take scissors away from puppy.8. Put present in box.9. Remove present from puppy's mouth.10. Put back in box after removing puppy from box.11. Take scissors from older dog & sit on them.12. Remove puppy from box & put on lid.13. Take tape away from older dog.14. Unroll paper.15. Take puppy OFF box.16. Cut paper being careful not to cut puppy's foot or nose that is getting in the way as it "helps".17. Let puppy tear remaining paper.18. Take puppy off box.19. Wrap paper around box.20. Remove puppy from box & take wrapping paper from its mouth.21. Tell older dog to fetch the tape so he will stop stealing it.22. Take scissors away from puppy.23. Take tape older dog is holding.24. Quickly tape one spot before taking scissors from older dog & sitting on them again.25. Fend off puppy trying to steal tape & tape another spot.26. Take bow from older dog.27. Go get roll of wrapping paper puppy ran off with.28. Take scissors from older dog who took them when you got up.29. Give pen to older dog to hold so he stops licking your face.30. Remove puppy from present & hurriedly slap tape on to hold the paper on.31. Take now soggy bow from puppy & tape on since the sticky stuff no longer sticks.32. Take pen from older dog, address tag & affix while puppy tries to eat pen.33. Grab present before puppy opens it & put it away.34. Clean up mess puppy & older dog made playing tug-of-war with remnants of wrapping paper.35. Put away rest of wrapping supplies & tell dogs what good helpers they are.